Active and Passive Dating: Your Paths to Finding 'The One' This Summer
Summer’s here, and with it comes a sense of excitement about getting out and about and embracing opportunities to meet new fascinating individuals.
Perhaps this summer you’re not long out of a long-term relationship or marriage and are flying solo for the first time? Or maybe you’ve been single for a while, and want to get back out into the dating scene but you’ve been struggling with how to get started?
Wherever you’re at, I understand this phase might feel overwhelming. But do you know what? It's also ripe with potential, and opportunities for rediscovering love!
Ways to date
There are three avenues that we tend to go down to meet and start dating people; they are: passive, active, and online.
In the modern tech world that we live in, online dating is often the most common way people meet, and you can read my top tips for finding success with this route in my previous blog, ‘7 Keys to Successful Online Dating’.
For today though, we’re focusing on getting you offline and out into the sunshine and the warm summer evenings, so you can create opportunities for some good old fashioned face-to-face connection.
Let’s begin with…
Passive Dating
Passive dating is the art of noticing and connecting with people naturally in your everyday environment. It might be at your local grocery store, during your kids' school run, or any number of places you frequently visit in your everyday life.
The charm of passive dating lies in its spontaneity, and the unexpected thrill of meeting someone while going about your usual routine.
It also requires some mastery with subtle communication, and by this, I mean the skill of flirting and giving the 'green light'.
The green light is an important signal that indicates you’re interested in getting to know someone better. To successfully communicate this, practice holding eye contact for a minimum of three seconds and do it at least three times. It’s not too intense, but just enough to show your interest.
And when it comes to flirting, this isn't about extravagant gestures. It’s about making a connection through conversation, asking intriguing questions, offering help, or seeking assistance with something to create a connection. Remember, the intention is to establish a rapport, not to be intrusive.
Now, let's switch gears to…
Active Dating
Active dating is a far more proactive approach to meeting someone, and often requires an investment of time, money, and intentionality.
The strategy here is to consider where your potential partner might be and position yourself within that context, so you have every chance of meeting them. You might decide to hang out at a different coffee shop, take part in a night class, or attend social gatherings outside your usual routine.
In essence, you create situations that allow you to cross paths with your ideal partner.
By actively doing this, you're not leaving your chances of meeting The One to fate, but rather, you're making conscious moves to increase the opportunity of meeting them.
Whether you're looking for an educated professional or an artistic soul, consider their likely hangouts and be prepared to venture outside your comfort zone to find them there.
And in case you’re scratching your head and wondering where to start and what possible locations you might find your ideal partner in, here are a few suggestions:
Gyms: Both in your local area and in neighbourhoods where your ideal partner might go
Grocery stores: Particularly on Friday nights, which are popular among singles
Fine dining restaurants: Solo diners often prefer quieter, more intimate settings
Friends' introductions: Your friends know you well and can often make thoughtful introductions
Volunteering: Join a local charity or social organisation to meet like-minded singles
Language classes: Perfect for those who love to travel
Creative writing classes: A fantastic place to meet creative souls
Personal development seminars: Ideal if you appreciate personal growth and seek a partner who shares this value
Real Estate seminars: Perfect for meeting individuals with multiple income streams and an interest in property investment
This is just a small fraction of the creative ways you can put yourself out there and actively connect with great people and start really broadening your dating horizons.
While navigating the dating scene after a long-term relationship or marriage can seem daunting, it can also be an extremely enriching experience that enhances your life in so many ways. So, embrace it with a curious and open mind, stay true to yourself, and let's make this summer a memorable chapter in your journey of love!
If you’d like support and guidance on your dating journey I’m here to help, so please book in for a free, no-obligation Breakthrough Coaching Call. Together we’ll discuss what’s been getting in the way of you finding The One, and ways that Dating Coaching can help you find the amazing love you deserve.
CLICK HERE to book your call – I’m excited to speak with you.